Unbelievably, we're nearing the four month anniversary of Taylor's latest release. I've always said that Taylor's albums come out at the times when I need them the most; The Tortured Poet's Department came out around the time I was questioning all of the decisions I'd made in the previous nine months and worrying about what they meant for the future. I had solid favourites from the beginning ('But Daddy I Love Him' and 'Peter' are still very much the ones I play the most) but I've warmed towards other tracks now. I knew I'd write a sequel blog post to my initial article about the album back in May, and here it is.
'So Long, London' is one of the most gut-wrenching songs Taylor has ever written; it's up there with 'Last Kiss' in terms of its vulnerability and honesty. Unlike 'Last Kiss' however, which I interpret quite literally, 'So Long, London' is littered with metaphors. She asks her former partner that we can all agree is most likely Joe Alwyn ‘how much sad’ he really thought she had in her. She was supportive of Joe's mental health issues until it became unbearable, but assures audiences that they had a 'good run'.
Taylor sings that she was 'sacrificed to the God's of your bluest days', the lyric implying her former partner would constantly need her assistance to appease himself during his lowest points. The line parallels a lyric in 'Peace' in which Taylor says 'I'm a fire, and I'll keep your brittle heart warm if your cascade ocean wave blues come'; Taylor eventually grew tired of the dynamic, most likely at the point it began impacting her own mental health too severely. It's not unlike recognising when a television show or film you're watching is hitting too close to home for you and you have to switch it off. Taylor felt depleted at the end of the relationship, her constant need to support her partner coming at a personal cost.
Joe is metaphorically referred to as 'London' throughout the song. Whilst the city has been a place of retreat for Taylor in the last few years, it's also been the backdrop to her longest relationship. Over time, London became less of a place that Taylor felt she could escape to and instead, she felt scared everytime she was there that Joe would reach his breaking point. And upon reflection, she wishes Joe the best, assuring him he'll find someone. I don't believe she's 'mad as hell' at him, necessarily, more so the situation.
A lot of people dislike ' I Hate It Here' because of the second verse. I wouldn't regard it Taylor's best writing, per say; had I written the song myself, I'd have most likely referred to the 1950's and the concept of going to Tiffany's for breakfast. The line about racists is a little too on the nose. The song reminds me of The Secret Garden, both the book and the stunning 1993 adaption. The text is almost a time capsule, a brilliant demonstration of how mental health was perceived in 1911. I related to Colin's anxiety spirals, the moments in which he would sob uncontrollably completely convinced he was going to die. Frances Hodgson Burnett's novel is about an orphaned 10-year-old girl, Mary, who after moving in to her uncle's home in Yorkshire, learns of a secret garden in the moors. After befriending the likes of the maid and the gardener, she soon embarks on the path to rediscover the hidden estate. Reading the book as a child, I believe, is the reason I grew up to befriend dinner ladies and my local postman.
In 'I Hate It Here,' Taylor sings about vehemently disliking the world she lives in to the point she constantly needs to escape to 'secret gardens' in her mind. Whilst the secret garden in Burnett's novel is real, Mary is only able to discover it after learning the 'pretty manners' her mother was known for; she is initially splenetic towards her new home. Taylor sings about being a 'precocious child' who reads books, which is easily the most relatable line in the song. As someone who daydreams to an almost maladaptive extent, I find the lyric very comforting. So often I get told to 'snap out of it' but Taylor seems to understand just how painful that can be.
In the second chorus, Taylor mentions dreaming about a faraway land the night she thought she would die. The lyric is quick and simple but holds so much weight. She felt so consumed by loneliness at one point she didn't believe she'd make it through the night. She sings that she’s away ‘most of the year’ when we all know that literally, she is not. It makes you question how much time she’s forced to spend in her own head.
'I Look in People's Windows' somewhat follows a concept I've discussed with my friends a lot in the last few years. I finished school in 2016 and left sixth form in 2018. It's been almost a decade since I've seen certain people in the flesh and yet I know how a lot them are getting on thanks to social media. For example, a girl I shared a lot of my GCSE classes with recently got engaged in Las Vegas. We haven't spoken in years but thanks to Instagram, I know about it. I'll also know when she gets married. My generation is the first that will always have a constant insight into the lives of the people we grew up with regardless of how many miles away our paths takes us. Taylor herself sings 'north bound I got carried away, as you boarded your train South'; despite how polar opposite our destinations might be, the chances are, you’ll always have some access to what’s going on. Obviously, we have a choice with how much we put ourselves out there. However, you'll always have a friend of a friend to share the information.
There's a certain sadness to this track; I can sense a fear in Taylor's tone that she may become a stranger to a former loved one. As she states in Miss Americana, we have no control over when and how people fall out of love with us and usually, it's irreversible. After I left school, I would have moments where I'd yearn to be back in the classroom and to have the presence of one of my old friends next to me to turn to. I didn't 'search for faces on streets', but I certainly wished they were there.
I refused to utilise Instagram until after I'd left school. The only thing I used throughout my teenage years was Snapchat, which I no longer have. The lyric 'transfixed by rose golden glows, they have their friends over to drink nice wine' references the glorified version of people's lives that we see over the internet. I couldn't use Instagram at school purely for this reason; I'd become very disheartened and insecure anytime I saw my peers sharing their lives and posing for selfies. Everyone and everyone seemed to be happier and living a more fulfilling life than myself. Taylor questions what would occur if the person she's singing to made eye contact with her 'one more time', her tone wistful and sombre. The 'what if' continues to haunt her to this day.
I have to finish this with a dive into 'So High School' because my Era's tour show was the night Travis unexpectedly hopped onto the stage. What a time for my phone to run out of storage. My sister managed to get a good chunk of it on camera, though I don't think it's necessary in retrospect. I'll never forget the moment. This song ignites a nostalgia in me for the American High School which I didn't even attend. I did, however, take A Level Philosophy and Religious Studies, so the reference to Aristotle means a lot to me. One of Aristotle’s works is called Poetics, make of that what you will. Some find it to be a dig at Travis' intelligence, but I find it merely references the typical, 2000's era romcom couple we're all used to. It's so Y2K that I wouldn't be surprised if Taylor wrote it with a glitter gel pen. If 'Paper Rings' is for Jake and Amy, 'So High School' is for Haley and Nathan.
The rhyming and consonance when Taylor sings 'in the blink of a crinkling eye I'm sinking our fingers entwined cheeks pink in the twinkling lights' is perfect, as is the joy obvious in her voice. The references throughout are unapologetically American; high school football games in Britain are no where near the cultural event that Friday Night Lights makes them out to be in the States. That said, I'm not the best person to ask regarding social activities during the formative teenage years. Perhaps they did happen, and I wasn't invited.
Thanks for reading everyone! I hope you're all enjoying the album as much as I am. Have an amazing August,
Karisma
xxx
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